20 Lessons From 2020
It's not hard for me to be anxious. To live in that weird state of constantly being afraid. Of simple, normal things. But also of the big thing that is life as a whole.
I've struggled with it for a long time, and still do from time to time. It's gotten under control now, I'd say.
I went into this year in a very weird personal situation that carried quite a lot of anxiety with it. It spiked truly at the end of January. Then it calmed down. And then the pandemic happened, and it spiked again. It stayed there for some time. But then, around May, it fell. I felt more calm than ever before in my life. This has carried through up until now, with a few minor exceptions.
Anxiety doesn't happen out of nothing. It's a response our body gives; a symptom, not a cause. The only way to minimize it is to find its cause. Maybe it's ego. Maybe a weak identity. Maybe too much input. Maybe not enough output. Or the other way around. The cause can be anything and everything, but it is there, and it can be solved. Don't be anxious of being anxious. If you can't fix the cause yourself, seek help. It's not an easy task.
Don't try to get rid of anxiety without looking for the cause(s).
Lesson thirteen: see behind the symptoms.